What Precautions Should You Take Before Accepting Advice?

There are various situations in which we may feel unable to make a decision without consulting. Others in which we simply want to have different points of view. In any case, before accepting advice, we must know certain realities that affect its validity.

Not all advice will be of benefit to us. Some can lead us to the wrong path. And since only we will experience the consequences of our actions, the wisest thing to do would be to be critical of the information that comes to us.

Thus, when you ask for an external opinion, regardless of the confidence that the person who gives us may inspire, do not forget to pass it through the filter of your critical thinking.

Each person sees the world through their own glasses

The same objective fact lends itself to a thousand different subjective interpretations. Each of us interprets reality based on our own thought patterns. There are those who always find the pleasant side of situations and those who only perceive the difficulty and risk.

Thus, for the same behavior, some may find naturalness and others bad intentions. Before deciding who you are going to approach for advice, analyze what type of glasses that person uses, what is their view of the world. Pay attention to how he gives meaning to what happens in his life and decide if you want that pattern for yours.

If you listen to those who wear the glasses of optimism, it will be easier for you to find answers that speak of learning, strength and new opportunities. On the contrary, if you go to the viewer behind a blurry and gray glass, you are most likely to get opinions based on fear, limitation and negativity.

Each one carries their backpack

Another aspect that most influences when generating an opinion in each person is their past. Their experiences, their experiences and their learnings condition the way they see life, especially if they have not been healed and integrated. Human beings have the tendency to compare current situations with past circumstances that have been similar.

In this way, you must bear in mind that the advice you receive will always be impregnated by the personal history of your interlocutor. If, for example, you find yourself undecided about the possibility of leaving your job and starting a business, the opinion of those who tried and succeeded will be different from those who failed in their attempt. And it will also differ from the one who never dared to try.

Likewise, if you consult a relationship problem with several friends, the one who maintains a relationship of emotional dependence will advise you something different to the one who found happiness on his own. And also something different from someone who managed to save their marriage after a crisis or someone who has always experienced a stable life as a couple without altercations.

Remember to filter their opinions and try to find out how they relate to their own experiences. Take their advice but understand that it reflects a large part of their history, and that they are not solely focused on your current situation.

Should I take advice from anyone?

In light of this information, you will have understood the need to be cautious before accepting advice from others. One of the most significant points that differentiate the work of a psychologist from the advice that a loved one can provide you is the cleanliness and objectivity of the former’s points of view.

Mental health professionals have extensive training that allows them to provide an objective and empirical-based view of the problems they address. But, in addition, many of them have carried out their own personal therapy process, which has allowed them to empty their backpack, refine their beliefs and heal their wounds. Thus, they are in a better position to guide others without their own history influencing their work.

But, since many of our indecisions are specific and do not require the intervention of a professional, try to go to people in your environment who meet these characteristics. Ask for the opinion of those who have gone through difficult situations and have managed to come out stronger. 

Surround yourself with people who have dared to look at each other, with their light and their darkness. May they be aware of their wounds and have them healed. And above all, remember: no one has a more valid opinion than yours when we talk about your own life.