Learning To Grow Old

Later for some and earlier for others, but we are all going to grow old. In this great transformation that the body and mind undergo, there is a breaking point that can become problematic. It is the moment when the work routine changes, either because retirement was accepted, or because age limitations prevent us from carrying out the activities to which we were accustomed.

In some cases these types of situations become truly serious. Sometimes the grandfather begins to feel that he is no longer useful and goes into strong periods of depression. He becomes distant or sullen. He remains alone most of the time and in the family he begins to be seen as an incomprehensible presence.

Learn to grow old

It ages as it has been lived. People who have led rewarding lives can generally accept age changes naturally. Those who have unresolved conflicts, unsolved frustrations and have cultivated conflictive relationships will have a more difficult time as they age.

In the latter cases, the lack of activity becomes a kind of trigger. It is no longer possible to distract those “to-dos” through work and daily commitments. Nor is it possible to make big changes in routine. And leisure, then, brings dissatisfaction with life to the fore.

This situation becomes especially difficult for people who have been very active or who value productivity above all else. For some it is like dying in life. Especially if they have not cultivated habits such as reading or hobbies that interest them.

Those around them and who love them see older people turn pale and experience contradictory feelings. Some guilt appears when witnessing this sad condition, but at the same time helplessness arises from not being able to help them in a more effective way.

The perception of life in its facet of fatality prevails : one grows old and inexorably a progressive decline appears, imposed by nature. No major changes can be made in this regard.

Although this is basically true, it is not the fact that there are ways for grandfather and those around him to have a better quality of life. Feeling useful and capable is one of the keys for the elderly to be able to deal successfully with the last stage of their life.

Learn to channel leisure

Leisure is not a residual time, but one of the most important dimensions of life. It is during the so-called “free time” when we have the greatest options to know ourselves, recognize ourselves and experience ourselves as integral beings. This is especially important in the elderly, when free time becomes the rule rather than the exception.

The answer about what to do with free time is not the same for every person. It strictly depends on the motivations, interests and tastes of each person.

If we are talking about a sociable grandfather, nothing better than to facilitate contact with groups of his age. These types of communities are very common in churches. Grandparents’ clubs or groups for reading or exercising have also become common.

If it is a grandfather who is comfortable only with his family, or who due to his physical ailments does not have facilities to leave home, the best alternative is to motivate him to develop a hobby that he can practice without major problem. Gardening, arts and crafts, and reading are good options.

In any case, the important thing is to design a structured routine. Time should be included for some productive activity on a daily basis. The best thing is that it is always done at the same time. 2 or 3 hours a day is enough. And it should include tasks that range from collaborating in the organization of some part of the house or a domestic job, to tasks that stimulate their creativity.

With little effort, you can help a grandfather to feel useful again. This will be reflected positively in your state of mind and will bring quality and meaning to your last years of life.