Start Walking And You Will Find The Way

When life changes plans, when adversity hits or stress builds up relentlessly, we become paralyzed. We stand stunned in the dark not knowing how to go on. All the bridges seem burned and the backpack weighs so much that it seems to anchor us to the ground. But start walking, and you will see how the path emerges.

Surely you are tired, exhausted rather. Perhaps sadness, fear or anger scream in your ear that it is time to lower your arms, to surrender. That you already gave your all and you only managed to reach the confusion and the feeling of failure that surrounds you today. Perhaps, you think, you are not cut out – especially now – for a full life.

However, if you manage to silence the destructive dialogue in your mind and just start walking, everything will become clear. You would never abandon a loved one at their worst; so why abandon you? Think of everything you would do for the person you love the most in the world; now, do it with you.

One step at a time

When you feel like you’ve hit rock bottom it is important that you learn to look into perspective and divide your objective into small goals. If you have a social phobia, do not impose yourself on a daily basis to participate in large gatherings or give lectures in front of a large audience. Setting these demands on yourself and blaming yourself for not meeting them would be unrealistic; but above all, it would be cruel.

If you have suffered from depression for years and think about traveling the world when you barely manage to get out of bed each day, a better future will seem unattainable. Likewise, if you hope to completely forget your ex within a few days of the breakup, you will become frustrated and punished when the inevitable healing sadness appears.

Start by accepting your process, whatever you are going through. Look at it head-on and accept it as part of your current reality. Above all, remember that it is exactly that: a process. If you only look at the goal, you will be flooded with anguish and uncertainty. However, if you focus on the next step, everything will become more accessible.

The first step may not get you where you want to go, but it does get you from where you are now. Do not underestimate the value of each step, of each small act, because through them you will rebuild your self-esteem and your confidence in your abilities.

So, start by talking to a neighbor in the elevator. Start by showering and shopping. Accept that coffee with a friend, even if you just want to stay home remembering your ex. Take one step at a time, and the path will be traced under your feet.

Walk forward

Very often, when we become paralyzed, we do so by entering vicious circles that only make our discomfort worse. For example: I don’t have a job, I feel useless and a failure because of it, and my solution is to avoid doing other activities so as not to think about it. Obviously, I am still unemployed because I am not looking for work, and the cycle continues.

Another case: nobody invites me to plans, meetings or parties. I feel alone and inadequate; therefore, I isolate myself for fear of rejection. The logical consequence is that, by isolating myself, I will not be able to establish relationships and they will continue without inviting me.

There are many infinite circles in which we are involved without even realizing it. But we must remember that it is in our power to change our current conditions if we are not happy. We just have to detect the cycle and take a step in another direction, get out of it, walk forward. 

Start walking and you will find the way

In short, sometimes it is necessary and healthy to stop. Stop, breathe and understand what is happening. Do an introspection exercise and calm your mind. But the only way to find the way is to start walking.

It is not necessary to know exactly where we are going, or how we are going to get there. It is not possible to wait to feel confident to start moving, because confidence arises from the steps we take. 

Theorizing and worrying without taking action is really harmful. It collapses us, distresses us and frightens us. As on a bicycle, to maintain balance you have to start pedaling. When you get going, the path will emerge before you.