I Only Ask One Thing: Let Me Help You

Put away your pride and let me help you. I know right now is what you need. An outstretched hand and a hug ready to comfort you. A few words of encouragement and that they listen to you without judging, just paying attention. Do not turn your back on me, do not reject the help that I offer you.

How many times have you wanted to provide support to a friend or family member and you have not been able to. Sometimes, it is not because you do not want to or because the other person has not asked you. You are simply acting in a way that contradicts what you are really asking for. Perhaps it is because you trust that you can get out of the problems that happen to you alone or, perhaps, the feeling of shame is haunting you.

If you have asked me for help, let me help you

Surely you have ever seen the need to ask for support. For this reason, you called without hesitation that friend who knows you so much or that brother that you know will give you the best advice. You have done it convinced that it could illuminate your situation, not fortunate at all. Unfortunately, not everything went as you thought.

Something went wrong in this whole process. Our attitude contradicted what we were looking for. The person in front of us, the one who was so willing to help us, was powerless to do so. Without realizing it, you were carrying out certain mechanisms that prevented that help from coming.

To begin with, you stopped listening when you didn’t like what you heard. It bothers everyone to realize that they have made mistakes, that perhaps the fault lies with one and not others. Being aware that the situation in which we are immersed was our choice is a reality that we do not want to recognize. Therefore, you closed your ears and also the doors to the help that they offered you.

However, this did not stop there. You were so bad … you were oozing emotions and needed to vent without stopping to think about how appropriate your words were. This helped you, but you did not allow the other person to express their opinion, to offer you any advice or allow you to open your eyes to what you were not aware of.

And what about that moment when you disappeared? You launched your call for help and all of a sudden it seems that you ceased to exist. Your friends, your family, eager to help you, all of them were left worried without knowing what to do. Acting like this was not fair. The help you requested was there, in front of you.

This causes us to become people who carry heavy weights without having a single break. By silencing your suffering, you distance yourself from people who would support you, who would feel identified, who you can help by telling your own story. Because we all have very bad moments, in which a good hug would scare away all evils.

We are strong, life and experiences make us more resistant. But, despite this, there will be many times when it will be positive to let us help. When you do, you will realize that overcoming a crisis with help strengthens bonds and wears less. In addition, you will discover wonderful people who were by your side and whom you did not appreciate enough.

Images courtesy of Catrin Welz-Stein