5 Things Mentally Strong Parents Don’t Do
Being mentally strong is a foundational life skill that is vitally important when it comes to parenting. Being mentally strong parents implies knowing how to regulate emotions, properly manage thoughts and have a productive behavior, even – and especially – when it seems that your children want to drive you crazy.
When it comes to building mental strength, there are common bad habits that can get in the way of reaching our full potential. Identifying and avoiding these mistakes can make a difference.
What Mentally Strong Parents Don’t Do
The way to establish good habits and build mental strength is to avoid the following mistakes and not fall into bad habits that, not because they are common, are healthy and necessary. They are as follows:
They don’t feel sorry for themselves
Mentally strong parents do not fall into the trap of thinking that their children are trying to punish or hurt them or that they are unfair to them. Mentally strong parents know that feeling sorry for yourself only delays solving a real problem.
Children and adolescents are the way they are, and it is in their nature to find a way to control the situation. It is part of their development. The solution is not to complain and play the victim, but to establish effective discipline rules and comply with them efficiently.
In this sense , mentally strong parents are proactive in solving problems and do not waste time regretting because they deserve better.
They do not shy away from their responsibility
It is very easy to blame problems and discomfort on a child because they annoy or misbehave, or because their attitude drives you crazy, or because of disproportionate reactions. Instead of blaming their children, mentally strong parents retain their personal power and accept responsibility for their emotions and behavior.
Mentally strong parents recognize that each time they get involved in a power struggle or lose their roles they are giving their children more power, so they stay in place to dominate the situation from the control of their emotions.
They don’t ignore changes
As children grow and develop, their attitude and behavior change, and their relationship with their parents changes. But many parents do not accept these changes, especially when they realize that their children are not or do not want to be as they wish, but choose their own path.
Mentally strong parents are capable of accepting these changes, of understanding them as an evolution, and they are willing to adjust their educational strategies and their way of relating to the needs of their children, to whom they recognize the individual freedom they deserve. .
They do not try to control their children
Controlling children is an arduous and useless task, because the more you oppress them, the more they need to exploit. Instead of controlling their children, mentally strong parents try to influence them – not manipulate them. To do this, they help them develop skills and give them the necessary tools to be successful in life, in all its facets.
In this sense, mentally strong parents are aware that education is not based on the imposition of criteria and the strict following of rules – many times not justified explained – but on the development of strong self-esteem and the learning of skills of management of emotions and decision-making, among others.
They don’t care about pleasing others
Mentally strong parents do not care about what they will say or to satisfy the expectations of others, even though they are labeled strict or old-fashioned. Mentally strong parents do not give in to pressure from other parents or other adults who do not understand their actions.
On the contrary, mentally strong parents are clear about their objectives, their strategies and the rules of their house, as well as the way in which you want to educate their children, which goes through teaching them to respect the decisions of others and enforce the respect of others. own.
Images courtesy of Pascal Campion
