Reduce Shyness Until It Ends

Shyness is determined by the temperament with which we are born. But our actions can qualify this reality.
Reduce shyness until it ends

From the moment of birth, some babies are more inclined to explore the environment while others are more withdrawn. However, during growth, the environment shapes our character and influences our personality. Therefore, if you want to reduce shyness, you will have to use experience to qualify a genetics that works against you.

You have to remember that if the anxiety you experience is excessively frequent or intense, you may suffer from social phobia. In this case, it is highly recommended to obtain professional help to deal with the problem. A professional psychologist will provide you with the necessary guidance. However, if you want to work to overcome your shyness, here are some guidelines.

Temperament and experiences

From the first months of a baby’s life, its temperament can be determined. This can be described as the tendency to explore the environment and experience new situations, or the inclination to stay in the safe zone.

Some children are born with a more open and trusting attitude towards their environment. In response, the people around him pay more attention and the child receives more opportunities to interact. In this way, he develops his social skills and receives positive reinforcement.

On the contrary, those children who, instinctively, are cautious and cautious receive less stimulation. These little ones tend to react with fear and suspicion to the unknown and take shelter from their parents in the face of any new situation. Therefore, the interaction with people in their environment is much less.

Their temperament takes them away from the opportunities they need to develop their skills. And the lack of practice makes his shyness increase with the passage of time. So if you’ve reached adulthood with a shyness problem, it’s time to start providing the experiences you need.

Guidelines to decrease shyness

Gradual exposure

Surely you’ve been avoiding social situations your whole life because of the discomfort they cause you. But the time has come for you to gradually expose yourself to them. It is the only way to overcome your fear and develop the potential that you have. To do this, make a list of the social situations that generate the most shyness in you. 

Then order them from the most bearable to the most troublesome. Ordering food delivery over the phone does not produce the same degree of anxiety as holding a conference in front of an audience. When you have your hierarchy of situations, begin to expose yourself to them gradually but at a steady pace.

You have to stay in the situation until your anxiety has drastically decreased. If you abandon the attempt before this happens, you are reinforcing your mental idea that it is an unpleasant circumstance. On the other hand, if you continue, you will see that the discomfort is reducing and that you are able to do so. Your self-confidence will increase significantly.

Combat anxiety before and after

Many times, the problem is magnified because before facing a dreaded situation we give it a thousand turns in our heads imagining the worst scenarios in which everything goes wrong. This generates an increase in anxiety and predisposes us to go to the exhibition with fear. If we avoid these anticipatory thoughts we will find ourselves much calmer and, after all, it is useless to imagine something that has not yet happened and suffer for it.

Likewise, when you finish the presentation, avoid falling into a negative thought loop. Do not analyze yourself, do not judge yourself or criticize your performance. Value the courage you have had to expose yourself, reinforce what you have done well and do not waste more mental energy on something that has already happened: continue with your life without more.

Decreasing shyness is in your hand

Using a breathing technique can help you a lot to control anxiety before and after social situations. And, accompanying this with gradual exposure, you will see how your shyness is fading and you are gaining confidence in yourself. Consistency will lead you to be able to face social situations without discomfort and even to enjoy them. Your temperament is only a trend, not a sentence.

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